Posted on
October 9th, 2009
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15 Comments
I’m going north to visit the folks for the Thanksgiving weekend (Canada has it in the correct month). When I say north, I mean black bears and moose in the backyard kinda north. Logging trucks on logging roads kinda north.
I’m hitching a ride with my younger sister in her familymobile; two boys and the “fun” uncle (me). Yay!
To compound matters, I also decided to volunteer my services in the dessert department. Pumpkin pie and crème brûlée. Something healthy, I thought.
Here’s the stash, ready for packing:
Oh no! A perfectly good pie shell ruined! Guess I’ll Have to make a pie right now :)
The part I hate is the killing of the pumpkin. Gruesome business, no matter how it’s done.
I admit, sometimes I feel a little remorse.
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Filed under: B Sides, Pictures
Posted on
March 20th, 2009
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2 Comments
I used to be an angry young man. Now I’m a slightly less angry mid-thirties man.
In the past I would’ve treated a brutal assault on my personal space as an affront to all I held near and dear. These days, an inattentively rude bump by a passing stranger will start me reflecting on how such callous mental vacancy can be made funny. For me.
In my maturity I prefer my satisfaction a little softer, a bit milder, slightly more painfully embarrassing.
I was thinking that an investment in half a dozen banana cream pies and a small card table would do. These would be transported to an ample sidewalk somewhere in the city. A camera operator somewhere on the opposite side would help to make the golden moments last.
I would then hold one pie aloft, flush with oncoming faces and clearly visible to all but the most inattentive of walking puff pastries. (There’s still a need to work out how to best keep the pie intact here, but I have faith in the innovative power of sweet retribution.)
Then I would simply wait, unmoving, timing how long it takes before somebody plants their puss square in the middle of startling, delicious sobriety. Society benefits, I laugh my ass off, and everyone gets a tasty, instructive treat. Just think of the potential!
Filed under: B Sides
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