Cat Ouija

Patrick — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 03:59:48 +0000

You know, it’s almost that time when everyone and their dog will be revealing what they think will happen in 2010. I visited a few such lists on the internet and they ran the gamut from the total annihilation of the earth to Jesus returning from heaven heavily armed and pissed. Obviously the problem here is that the lists are being produced by people and their dogs. Everyone knows cats have spooky psychic abilities, they’re the choice for predicting the future.

I decided to make a title image for this because I paid four bucks for that sheet of Bristol board and I’ll be damned if I only use it once.

For tonight I decided to ask Oliver just one question after starving him for the evening. Figure I’d cut him some slack on the first time out. Here’s how the setup works: In round 1, a psychic motivator (in blue package below) is placed on each number to, well, motivate Oliver to make a selection, thus informing us of his psychic prediction. The numbers represent the number of letters in the answer, the letters are used to spell out the answer. Cat Ouija, basically.

I whispered the question into his ear and let him loose. The question was, “What will the most important event of 2010 be?” I know, pretty ambiguous, but I figured the answer would be even more so. In the first round, Ollie selected how many letters would be in the answer by munching on number 12:

In the second round I placed two pieces of motivator on each letter, thereby allowing for a prediction where each letter could be selected twice. I then set Ollie loose to reveal the 12-letter answer he had promised. You’ll have to trust me when I tell you what the answer as I couldn’t record, shoot, and watch as he gobbled up the future, all at the same time.

The answer, I must say, was a little obtuse: MLKLYZYMONPP

I have a couple of guesses on the meaning. MLK could easily stands for milk. LYZ? Probably layzee. MON is obviously Monday, and PP is most likely people. The message may be an imperative: Milk lazy Mondays, people!

I’m not sure how that qualifies as an event.

Could be my interpretation is wrong; maybe it’s a headline and these are the first letters of the words. Mayor Lima Kills Lovely Young Zebra Yesterday Morning On Northern Private Property. That seems a little more newsworthy. Lima is obviously not in the current running for mayor so he’ll be a surprise win. When he enters the race, put your money on Lima! Not sure how the zebra’s mixed into all this. Maybe African animals have migrated to Canada due to global warming?

Maybe this is Lindsay Lohan’s phone number, coded using the letters on the keypad instead of the numbers. Am I supposed to call her? I don’t really have anything nice to say.

Predictions to ponder.

I’ll have to run more of these by Oliver soon. He takes requests should you have a burning question on your mind, but I’ll have to limit how many answers he can consume in a single sitting. He’s already a bit doughy.

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Cat Ouija