Gentle head shake for emphasis

Posted on October 20th, 2009 6 great comments. Room for one more!

So I think this is the LG Fashion Week.

those columns aren't very practical

I gotta be honest with you, I don’t follow it too closely. I mean, I may not be that stereotypical sport-watching (unless you count Formula 1), beer-drinking (not averse though), guy who communicates through bodily noises (though I’m guilty of relaxing, certainly), but fashion is lost on me entirely. I firmly believe that heterosexual male genes do not allow one to comprehend fashion. The mind simply does not connect with it. Sure, it looks good on the girl, but in what way is it practical?

Will it keep my hands warm in the winter? Is it coloured neon orange so that in the event of an emergency I can wave it aloft to signal airborne emergency crews? Is it worth the money? Because I don’t need any tassels or doohickeys, and sure as hell no fluffy balls; I just want my money’s worth (and an extra pair of shoelaces). Since fashion is simply a word, a subjective concept like God or banana bread, it doesn’t affect the decision-making process.

And then there’s this:

psychotically calm

I don’t know how the women put up with this. When I sit down for a haircut, I’m expecting to be out in fifteen minutes. Chatter to a minimum – cutting of the hair is priority. These girls probably sit in those chairs for hours having crap smeared on their faces and chemicals tossed on their hair. I’d have a powder brush to someone’s throat in about thirty seconds.

I doubt there will be a repeat of last year’s humorously inebriated speech by Robin Kay, the president of the Fashion Design Council of Canada (and major Fashion Week organizer).  “[That] kind of bad behaviour is the equivalent of wearing a bad accessory”, said one of the event’s vice-presidents afterwards.

I really only have a gestural response to this one: *palm up, shrug, and “I have no idea” smirk*

I might also add: *gentle side-to-side head shake*; for emphasis.

The same could be said of the following item:

graveyard of failed scarves

You may have noticed that this doesn’t look much like Fashion Week anymore, but it is somewhat related. They’re trying to get me to call this “yarnbombing” after the graffiti word “bomb” (to paint), but I refuse to do it. It’s a bunch of knitted yarn tied a utility pole in a park for the purpose of beautifying it. I read about it in a Star article today which tried to equate the activity of affixing a knitted square to a fence, to spray-painting a wall in a dank, dark alley.

Don’t get me wrong, putting cozies on everything isn’t such a bad thing. But as many people (mostly ladies) who put their knitting and stitching up last year discovered, a little rain or snow will quickly give their good intentions the middle finger.

Just not practical.

6 Comments on “ Gentle head shake for emphasis ”

  • GTO
    October 20th, 2009 8:53 pm

    Yes, you're right.

    The LG fashion week, is a hair-cut shop???

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  • Patrick
    October 21st, 2009 6:53 am

    LG Fashion Week is a week-long set of fashion shows and events (most of them don't happen under these tents, I don't think). However, GTO, there's definitely hair cutting going on :)

  • Plastic Mancunian
    October 21st, 2009 8:38 am

    I too have never understood fashion. My missus insists on coming with me when I buy clothes to make sure I never commit a fashion faux pas. God gorbid that I should buy something comfortable.




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  • Patrick
    October 22nd, 2009 6:57 am

    One of the main reasons I'm divorced, Mancunian!

  • jafagirls
    June 12th, 2011 5:20 am

    “But as many people (mostly ladies) who put their knitting and stitching up last year discovered, a little rain or snow will quickly give their good intentions the middle finger.”

    Nope, ours has stayed up through rain and snow and did just fine :) some lasting a year before they got sun bleached and cut down.

    Read more from jafagirls at:
  • Patrick
    June 15th, 2011 11:32 am

    In fact they did, jafagirls! I can’t say I totally understand your initiative but I could think of a million worse ways to spend your time. Thanks for trying to make our city a better place!

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